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As I mentioned a few weeks back, it’s been a very lean year for olives. This week, Tessa and I managed to harvest all of our crop in a single day – a job that took four people four days last year. And the results are predictably depressing: barely 10% of last year’s take – maybe 2 month’s worth of olive oil. It’s like this all over Le Marche, probably because of the drought over the summer, and the price of oil is shooting up.
But lean year or not, it was worth a trip to the olive press in Massa Fermana today to take some videos of how they do it. Where last year the press was in operation 24-hours a day (Lino had to settle for a 3am slot and he’s a respected man down there) this year they told us we could come anytime this afternoon. Last year the boys at the press looked hag-ridden and irritable, a parade of vans steadily disgorged a stream of crates into the warehouse, and people hurried in all directions. This year was slightly different:
But at least the lull allowed me to get good shots of the process. And the boys at the machinery didn’t seem to mind the intrusion – they seemed almost grateful for a break in the tedium. Last year I reckon I’d have been run down by a wheelbarrow. I had the chance to ask them a few questions, some of which they answered. When I asked about what makes oil virgin or extra virgin they looked at me blankly. Just press your olives like the rest of the punters and take your oil home, they seemed to say.
Why can’t a heterosexual guy tell a heterosexual guy that he thinks his booty is fly?
Following tip-offs from Kiwis Peter B and Gareth, please see clip below. And if you’d like some more, there are links to some other brilliant Conchords songs below the video.
Excellent article also published in the Guardian. Biofuels just get worse and worse.
A couple of nights ago Marco and I met up for a drink at Urbe. Paolo poured glasses of red and we picked over the plates of snacks set out on the bar. Outside the low clouds were drizzling steadily into the fields, which have abruptly changed to shocking green after months of drought.
I told Marco about recent chaos at work that might require me to spend more time in the UK. He was puzzled when I explained that I disliked the idea of being pulled away from Marche to spend more time in London – especially at pista time. I told him if I had to choose between career and the pista, I think I’d probably pick the pista.
And he told me about work on his building sites recently grinding to a halt.
Most of my workers are out sick, he said.
If you missed it the first time, that Mitchell and Webb Sound is back on Radio 4 (audio link – or go to the listen again page). This week’s show is brilliant (especially Beaufort) so catch it before they update the file with next week’s show.


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